I'm a lesbian and my girlfriend caught me watching straight porn - she shoved me

DEAR DEIDRE: MY girlfriend was so angry when she discovered I’d been watching heterosexual porn that she shoved me around and poured paint over me.

I’m a 34-year-old female and my girlfriend is 36.


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I used to date men in my 20s but stopped when I realised that even though I enjoyed their company, I didn’t particularly enjoy sex with them.

Even with that being the case, I preferred to watch heterosexual porn rather than gay porn, but I didn’t tell my partner because I didn’t think it was a problem.

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Clearly, I was wrong, and I blame myself for not being upfront about it but I didn’t expect the abuse she inflicted.

I am trying to move on from this but I feel traumatised.

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DEIDRE SAYS: You did not do anything wrong. Many people watch porn as well as enjoying sex with their partner.

Your girlfriend clearly felt threatened but watching porn does not mean you were unhappy with your sex life with her.

Your girlfriend poses a danger to you.

Don’t wait for another angry outburst or give her any more chances. My support pack Abusive Partner explains more.

Talk to Galop (galop.org.uk, 0800 999 5428) who support LGBT+ people who have experienced abuse and violence.

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